10 Simple Self-Love Tips

Click image for source: Elephant Journal

Click image for source: Elephant Journal

I am a love bug. I have no problems telling the world about all the things I love. Repeatedly. My “About” section is full of love. I tell my family and friends how much I love them daily. I am the annoying one in the car that screams “OHMAGAAAAWD I LOVE THIS SONG”… every single song.

So why is it when I come to myself I get tongue tied? It’s like a first date. My eyes hit the floor. I shift from foot to foot. I get coy.

And a lot of people I know seem to be struck by the same affliction. I have deducted that this is down to two things; either we are embarrassed at the thought of loving ourselves or we truly don’t. Both of those are wrong.

Self-love is not being selfish.

It is about being kind to yourself. Allowing yourself rest. Turning your inner monologue into a cheer squad instead of a lynch mob.  Most importantly, self-love is vital.

So if you aren’t already, it’s time to get on the self love train. Toot toot!

1. Write yourself a letter of advice

I am terrified of flying. So, on a trip to Bali my mum suggested that I write a letter to my imaginary teenage daughter about living a full life. Silly as it sounds, it worked. I wrote rational truth and vicarious dreams and because I technically wasn’t talking to my self-doubting self I gulped it all up. So when I was feeling lost the other day I pictured my 80 year old self writing a letter of advice. It’s a great way to remind yourself that you only live once! (Did I just YOLO?).

2. Practice mindfulness

Meditation can be quite intimidating but it is an unbelievably powerful tool. If you have tried it before and couldn’t quite ‘get it’ then know that you don’t have to master it to feel the benefits. Sarah Wilson (of I Quit Sugar fame) describes it as a “jerky, nervous, chattery [experience] that is far from inspirational”. The more you exercise your stillness muscle the stronger it gets… keep at it. Here are some amazing meditation resources that I use;

  • The Chopra Meditation Center (Yes Deepak!) is a constant source of inspiration not to mention a comprehensive resource. Explore!
  • I love this guided meditation by Melissa Ambrosini
  • Buy some guided meditations either on iTunes or at your local alternative health store. (I can’t recommend this set of 22 Perfect Health Meditations enough – just gorgeous!)

3. Accept compliments

If someone gives you a compliment smile broadly and say Thank You. Hell – agree with it if you want to!

4. Stop pointing out what is wrong

Make a concerted effort to only point out the positives – even if you don’t feel like it. Brainwashed positivity is more contagious than the flu and has an amazing knack for changing your perspective.

5. Take a step towards your dreams (even if it’s a small one!)

You owe yourself your dreams so if you are living a life where you are constantly standing still admiring them you are not going to feel very fulfilled. So, whatever your dream take a step towards it – no matter how small! For example; you dream of being an illustrator? Enter an art competition. You fantasise about living in New York? Stick a photo of Times Square on your computer at work. Want to feel healthier? Join a local wellness Meetup group. It doesn’t have to be anything dramatic… just a little love note to the universe telling it that you are ready for what it’s got to throw at you.

6. Take a step away from social media

It is unrealistic to think of life without social media… it’s here. And thank god because otherwise we wouldn’t be chatting now! But sometimes it can be so damn overwhelming. So – starting today – do something to reduce your usage. Make a rule that you do not check it first thing in the morning. Give yourself allocated social media times – once in the morning, midday and afternoon. Never consume more than one media at once (I.e. watching TV while tweeting; cruising instagram while on the phone etc).

7. Random acts of kindness

If you are low on love for yourself logic would have it that you need to keep as much as you can for yourself. Hoard your happy. However, I have found that as low as you feel if you can muster the energy to do something for someone else it magically makes you feel better. This quote really sticks with me – “Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness, and understanding you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again” (Og Mandino).

8. Dedicated you-time

Allot yourself a specific time once a week where you pamper the fuck out of yourself! Turn off your phone and do exactly what it is that makes you feel fabulous. If that is lighting your expensive candles, pouring a champagne and chillaxing in the bath for 2 hours then go for it!

9. Express yourself

Commit to expressing yourself without judgement. Paint, run, cook, read, dance, go to a nudist beach, sit under a tree alone, sing – do whatever it is that make you feel 100% authentically you. Don’t judge yourself on it (i.e. “I’m not a very good painter”) just let your body and mind move however it feels right.

10. Unleash your inner 12 year old

Go into a room by yourself. Put your favourite song on. Now dramatically mime it. Dance! I have never managed to do this without feeling better afterwards. Laugh at yourself. Don’t take life too seriously.

What about you? Do you have a never-fail self-love pick me up?
Love to hear in the comments.

My Journey Continues to Detoxville

Just in case you have missed my last 5 million posts, tweets or instagram pics … I am on a massive journey of personal transformation.  God that sounds wanky… but it’s true! I said I will always be honest and transparent on my blog and I meant it! For some background on my journey so far see my last post here but in short I am renovating my life and removing everything I don’t need: bad food, thoughts, people and practices. If it doesn’t serve me well I don’t want it in my life. It feels so good to finally be walking my talk. It has been (and continues to be) surprising, confronting, empowering, consuming and energising. There have been setbacks and touchdowns. In fact this past fortnight I have hit my fair share of speed bumps…

What the pHuck?

What the pHuck?

I have been eating around 80% organic. I have been drinking plenty of water. I have been moving my body. I have been eating a largely plant-based diet. No grains. So I bought myself some pH sticks** and was not-so-quietly confident about the bright purple result I was about to witness.  You should have seen me approaching the counter – I had swagger (which is particularly impressive considering I was pushing a pram). So, imagine my surprise when my pH reading came up as fairly bright orange 5.5. How on earth was I so acidic? Where could I have gone wrong? I have been a saint, dangnammit!!! Or had I?

** I spoke about pH in this post about Wellness and Green Smoothies but to summarise; an acidic body is a breeding ground for illness and disease, the goal is to stay alkaline.

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Time to get real

The great thing about paring every part of your soul back is that you tend to reveal some overlooked home truths. Things that you may not have wanted to admit or habits that were so ingrained that you were truly unaware you were even doing them. So I looked hard in the mirror and realised there were some hurdles I needed to hurdle before I see the purple.

Acidic Behavior #1: Stress and Alcohol

The Real Deal: Even though I have been working hard on overcoming my anxiety it still rears its ugly head. If I am going to conquer it I need to pull out all stops and work a bit harder. And while the Cortisol (stress hormone) pulsing through my veins is enough to send me into the red I then self-medicate with a glass of red which is extremely counterproductive.

Action Step: Time to count anxiety butt-kicking as my full time profession and shelf the wine for special occasions only. And no Em… Thursday is not a special occasion.

Acidic Behavior #2: Too Much Superstuff

The Real Deal: I have realised that I a woman of excess. I tend to overload myself in virtually every aspect of my life (which includes the good bits). So when I discover a Superfood I tend to assume the more the better. Not so. Nuts are great… in moderation. Raw treats are fun to make… not every day. Coconuts are great… but it is possible to have a meal without one… put the goddamn coconut down woman!!!

Action Step: I am on the right track… I just need a little fine tuning. I have all the right ingredients I just need to get the proportions right to make this cake rise!

Raw Caramel Slice - NOT a healthy breakfast foodFollow me on Instagram @oliveonblonde

Raw Caramel Slice – NOT a healthy breakfast food
Follow me on Instagram @oliveonblonde

Time For A Cleanse

Master Cleanse goodness!Follow me on Instagram @oliveonblonde

Master Cleanse goodness!
Follow me on Instagram @oliveonblonde

So I decided to approach my life detox differently. I have been slowly removing all the bad elements of my life which is a great introduction to healthy changes but it seems I have stagnated.  Time to splash some cold water on me and kick this thing up a notch. So I have embarked on a juice cleanse. Now this is midday of Day 2 and considering I have so far written a page of semi-lucid thoughts and have not started hallucinating I must be doing alright. Pineapple Zanzibar.

Body

I have created my own tailored detox which is a mishmash of the many I have read about. I have combined ideas from The Blue Print Cleanse (which I heard about from ex-pat blogger Willy B Mum) with the Master Cleanse and a few cheeky recipes from Vegie Head. After I finish the cleanse I will write a whole post about it and include exactly what I did and include the recipes and results. I may even be brave enough to post pictures – Eeep. Well nothing like a bit of pressure to motivate you.

Even hubby is getting in on the cleanse action. What an easy packed lunch!Follow me on Instagram @oliveonblonde

Even hubby is getting in on the cleanse action. What an easy packed lunch!
Follow me on Instagram @oliveonblonde

Mind

On top of the juice cleanse I am also mentally detoxing… considering this is a large contributor to my acidic reading. I have started myself on a magnesium supplement as well as taking Australian Bushflower Essences morning and night. I am halfway through the Oprah and Deepak Chopra 21-day Meditation Challenge and my goodness is this making a difference! Throw in the good bits like journalling, sleeping,Vitamin D and letting my feet touch the ocean every day.

Action Steps

So while my post at the end of this will be more detailed this is what I am doing to cleanse myself…

  • 3 days of 70% juice then 7 days of 100% juice
  • Oil pulling every morning
  • Dry brushing every morning
  • Apple Cider Vinegar every morning
  • Australia Bush Flower Essences and Magnesium Supplement every night
  • Regular exercise and sunshine
  • More sleep (if my 4 month old little goose allows!)
  • No alcohol!

Oh yeah… and I got rid of my microwave!!!

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A Final Word

When I have told a few of my loved ones that I am doing a juice cleanse they had a bit of a chuckle at me. They mentioned that I have just about tried everything health fad under the sun and getting rid of my microwave is proof that I am insane! I think it was meant as a snipe but surely there can’t be a better compliment? It shows that instead of accepting a body and mind that I am unhappy with, I will never stop working towards my perfect self. People always say that you should never quit but then sometimes when you put that into practice you are met with skepticism. I say that as long as you never quit quitting you are on the right track. As long as you never stop striving to be the best person you can then you are always improving. Even if every day I only move one step forward it is better than just standing still.

So if you are one of those people too – that is working towards that ultimate goal and trying everything that you can… bloody good on ya! I think you are amazing.

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